windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
