sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize