i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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