how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
