I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
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