he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
