You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
