Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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