And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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