I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
