i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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