is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
