I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
