i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
