Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize