if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
This is the high leading the old right now
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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