so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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