God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
