just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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