just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Randomize
