so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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