Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Enjoy the penises
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
