like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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