Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
