Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
