If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
