i'm signing you up for texting rehab
kristin has been a bad kristin
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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