i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Everclear isn't food dammit
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I know her cup size but not her name....
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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