Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
