so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
