Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
