people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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