There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize