found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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