just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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