I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
