Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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