her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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