she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
