4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
