I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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