I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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