I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
