Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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