There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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