You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Your tits are I can't wait for
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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