I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
