Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
