me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
