Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
