There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
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