Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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